PRESENCE: The Intagible Aura of Leadership

Volume #40 - February 2005

I like to write about issues that come up frequently for my clients and this one has come up a lot lately. What¹s challenging about leadership presence, however, is that presence is hard to describe. You know when someone has presence, and you know when someone doesn¹t, but it can be difficult to describe exactly what characteristic a person possesses or lacks that affects his or her ability to show up with the presence of a leader.

In the dictionary, presence is defined as "bearing, personality or appearance that is characterized by poise and confidence." But it also states that presence has a supernatural or divine spirit to it. To me presence is a combination of an appealing physical appearance, confident body language, assertive communication skills and positive engaging energy that actually creates some kind of energetic field around a person that attracts others.  When a person has all these traits they have an aura of power that translates into the presence of leadership.

It¹s critical for people developing themselves professionally to pay attention to each of these areas; so, let¹s go through them one-by-one.

Appearance

An appealing physical appearance doesn¹t mean that you have to have movie-star looks or spend a fortune on clothes, but it does mean that you need to dress appropriately and professionally. Your appearance sends a message about who you are. You might not be able to judge a book by its cover, but, whether you like it or not, people will judge you by what you look like.

In this age of attention to diversity, this might sound politically incorrect, but if you want to draw people to you, you need to show up in a powerful way that attracts a majority of people. Therefore, pay attention to the message your clothes and appearance send. Do they in any way stereotype you, perhaps making you appealing to one group of people, but creating a turn-off for a larger number of people? For example, are you a walking advertisement for the flower power of the sixties? Are your clothes so tight and tiny that you reveal too much skin and too much ink? Does most of your wardrobe make you look like you¹re heading to or coming from the gym? If you answered yes to any of these questions, that¹s fine as long as you understand that your appearance will appeal to people who are most like you, but will not necessarily help you project the presence of a leader to a broader spectrum of people. To attract people to you, they need to feel that you can relate to them. As a leader, they also want to feel confident that you have power and know what you¹re doing. The way you dress influences those associations and their opinions about you.

Even in a dress-down culture, it¹s a good idea to dress a notch above the norm. It won¹t help you to set yourself completely apart by wearing a suit in a jeans culture, but it will help if you wear well tailored slacks. If you¹re a woman it¹s even more important to dress up rather than down, and the higher up you are on the chain the more you will be scrutinized. This means that as a woman, even when you wear casual slacks, it¹s good to wear a jacket too because it translates into greater authority. Whether it seems fair or not, people are attracted to and respond better to people who dress well and look appealing.

Body Language

Your body language communicates more about you than anything you say. If people have ever said to you, "It¹s not what you say, it¹s how you say it," pay attention! The pitch and tone of your voice, your facial expressions, and the way you hold your body send huge messages about what¹s going on inside of you. Your body language will reveal your level of confidence and your emotional intelligence. With good body language, you demonstrate your openness to others, your willingness to listen, your understanding of others and the issues at hand, and your confidence in yourself and your ability to handle situations.

I¹ve had women at my workshops who talk about how they aren¹t recognized at meetings, aren¹t heard, and have their ideas stolen. But even in telling their stories I see the way their body language changes. Their bodies collapse. Their heads tilt down. Their voices get smaller and harder to hear. I can imagine what happens in the conference room. Leaders with presence project that presence. Their bodies ooze positive energy. Their faces reflect their confidence. Their voices land on people with the impact they intend.

To help yourself improve in this area, read up on ways to move your body so that it sends the messages you want it to. There are all kinds of tricks for projecting greater power from the way you sit in a chair to the way you move your hands to the way you enter a room. Watch yourself in a mirror to understand better what you do with your body. Tape record your voice to understand how you sound and what areas you need to focus on to project more power. Have yourself videotaped ‹ this is a powerful and somewhat scary way of really getting a good look at yourself. Ask trusted colleagues to give you honest feedback in a variety of settings so you can understand the specific areas on which you need to work.

To project the presence of a leader it¹s critical for you to know how to control your body and teach it to speak the language of leadership.

Assertive Communication

If you¹re a faithful reader of my newsletter, you¹ve read this before, but in order to exude the presence of a leader, you must be a good communicator, which means you must know how to communicate assertively. As an assertive communicator, you know how to clearly articulate your thoughts and express your opinions. You engage others by asking intelligent powerful questions and you actively listen to what people say. You remain grounded yet can dance in the moment without getting thrown off kilter or erecting defensive barriers. You have good boundaries and won¹t allow yourself to be taken advantage of, and, at the same time, you communicate respectfully with others, not taking advantage of them or communicating with them in an aggressive or passive-aggressive manner.

As an assertive communicator you know how to have your voice heard, not by shouting over others, but by commanding attention through the clear articulation of your ideas, the tone of  your voice and the confidence of your body language. You know how to focus conversations and keep people on point. Your words act as a bridge to others. People listen when you speak because they know you don¹t hog air space but that what you say is worth listening to because your comments are honest, clear, direct, respectful and valuable.

Moreover, as an assertive communicator you are also emotionally intelligent: you understand people and know how to shape your communication to particular audiences so that you are properly heard and understood. You have a good ability to read people and the situation and know how to adapt your communication to meet the needs of the moment. Since a main aspect of leadership is to know how to influence and motivate people toward specific goals, you understand what you need to say and how you need to say it to reach and influence people at any given time.

Energy

This is where the spiritual aspect comes in ‹ spiritual meaning beyond the physical, beyond what you can hear or see. The energy of presence comes from within a person and emanates outward engaging and embracing others. It¹s invisible, not immediately accessible to us through our five senses; yet, we know it¹s there. Many people are still skeptical about energy and think of it as new age hocus-pocus. But if you¹ve ever had a really good deep massage or acupuncture that was done properly you can actually feel the "chi" or energy in your body moving differently. On a quantum level, we are masses of energy. Even our thoughts are energetic and influence not only our own body systems, but they also move out beyond us to influence others, both positively and negatively. Others can feel that energy without actually touching it.

The positive energy of a leader contains passion, vision and hope.  So make sure your thoughts and ideas are positive and hopeful. Look for possibilities and see the good in others. Open yourself up to others and people will feel your positive energy and will be drawn to you.

When positive energy is combined with articulate communication skills, keen emotional intelligence and an appealing personal attitude and appearance, the result is presence.

COACHING QUESTIONS

1. What kind of message does your appearance transmit?
2. What kind of people tend to be drawn to you?
3. Who would you like to attract ?
4. What do you need to change about your appearance?
5. What does your body language say about you?
6. How can you get feedback to help you get an accurate perception of what your body says about you?
7. What do you need to do to improve your body language?
8. How articulate are you?
9. What do you need to do to become a more assertive communicator?
10. What do you need to do to understand the concept of energy more?
11. How would you describe your energy?
12. What do you need to do to change your energy so that you attract more people to you?

Copy © 2005 Virginia O'Brien All s Reserved

back to top | return to newsletter index