Gaining and Maintaining Power

Volume #10 - May 2000

Power - whether positional or personal - is the ability to motivate othersb to get things done. Yet, owning our power can still trip many of us up. The teleclasses on power, which I held this spring, drew a lot of interest and numbers of people made requests for notes. So, back by popular demand, here are more strategies for gaining and maintaining power.

First and foremost, you gain power when you know who you are. Power is about being in control of yourself. It's about having confidence in yourself and passion about your values and beliefs. Identify your core values and live and work by them. If your core values are not present in your everyday working world, you will not find happiness and fulfillment. Your values serve as navigational tools. They help you determine whether you are going in the direction and they can anchor you if you get caught in a storm. I have found that when clients are struggling with unhappiness at work, the underlying cause is usually some type of "values disconnect."

Know what you want and accept responsibility for managing your career. Take control. You gain power when you know what your goals are. Have a vision for where you want to go and think BIG. You lose power when your goals aren't set high enough.

Make yourself visible and ask for what you need. You gain power when you are properly positioned, when people can see your strengths and talents. People need to know your worth. Make your goals known so that people can help you achieve them. Be proactive. Don't be shy. For example, if you know additional education will help you advance and your company funds executive development, make sure your boss knows that you want the opportunity. You also lose power when you don't ask for enough. I believe one of the reasons there is still pay inequity between men and women is that many women simply don't request as much money as men do.

Rewrite self-limiting beliefs. You gain power when you change the old tapes playing in your head. One of my clients had a breakthrough recently when she started paying attention to how many negative messages were occupying her time. She was startled to see how much of her energy was being used to keep her locked in the same old pattern. So, empower yourself by paying attention to the messages you're sending yourself. Create new empowering affirmations and start playing them over and over. Unfortunately, we can't just throw out the old tapes - they've etched grooves in our minds. But with practice we can tape over them to create rich, new beliefs

Manage your emotions and communicate directly and clearly. You lose power when you send mixed messages or react emotionally. Learn how to communicate assertively. Being assertive means giving and getting respect. It's a win/win scenario. Assertiveness is not about pleasing others or avoiding conflict; it's about setting boundaries, saying "no," and honoring yourself. The more assertive you are, the more self-confidence you build. Don't be aggressive or passive-aggressive. Learn effective interpersonal communication skills so that you send distinct, understandable messages that clearly convey your thoughts and feelings. As women, we have the advantage of being in touch with our emotions - we have relational intelligence. You gain power when you use that knowledge wisely.

Take calculated risks. Both power and risk require movement and courage. There is a difference between taking calculated risks and risky actions. Do your homework. Assess situations. Gather information. Understand the environment. Develop worst case scenarios. Consider lost opportunities. Then, push through any remaining fear you have and make your move. Focus on the positive. Regardless of the outcome, you will have gained valuable knowledge. When you avoid taking risks you not only lose your power, but you also lose precious opportunities.

Develop a strategic network of influential contacts and mentors. You gain power through relationships. Research indicates that networks of influential contacts and well placed mentors are two areas still creating challenges for women who want to climb corporate ladders. When you understand where the power bases are, you can develop relationships with key people who will expand your area of influence, your access to resources, your capacity to make things happen, and your ability to advance your career.

Finally, perception is greater than reality - you can gain power by acting as though you have power. Stay grounded in the belief that you are important.

COACHING QUESTIONS ON POWER

1. What are your two most important core values?
2. Are your career goals big enough?
3. What do you need to ask for now to advance your career?
4. What affirmation can you create to change a stubborn, negative thought pattern?
5. What kind of messages do you send?
6. What did you learn from the last risk you took?
7. What can you do now to expand your strategic network?

Copy © 2000 Virginia O'Brien All s Reserved

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